I'm Off!

I'll be on the road tomorrow morning and should make it to California in 2 days or so. I'll be visiting my grandparents for a few days and then it's up to Oregon! So until then, be well and I hope I see you all when I have internet access again. Probably won't be too long since I have panic attacks and tear at my hair when i'm not able to log on.

xoxo
Alex

P.S. Just a suggestion, If you love kwah tiki yah flicks go rent "KUNG FU HUSTLE" right now! It's the best fooey i've seen in years.

P.S.S. Steven, Good luck with your gig tomorrow. Bite Will on the leg for me. My mother eagerly awaits Awards tickets, so hurry up and make yourself famous.

Boob Villa

Well the lack of posting was due to getting my mothers house in move-in condition and the back house to rental condition so I can get the hell out of this holy rolling steam blowing shit pit and get to Oregon. I go either tomorrow morning or saturday morning. Probably saturday because im pretty tired and need a rest. For the last month or so I've been working 9 to 10 hours a day 6 to 7 days a week. When I wasn't working I was making trips to Lowes or Home Depot. No big deal except they are in shreveport over an hour away.
I am pretty proud of having done all the work myself, for my first time I think I did ok.
This is the cottage out back, it used to be a beauty shop. Just getting to this stage took ripping out carpet and chiseling away what was under that, 50 year old green vinyl tile. It made me grumpy.. You remember the kind they had in the lunch room at elementary school? Yeah that stuff.
Before

After that I laid down wood floors, painted, put up wainscot and trim and put together a couple of the kitchen cabinets. There is more to do but the rest is pretty simple stuff that shouldn't cost her very much and she needs an electrician and plumber in there anyway. 2 things that I wont touch. Electric because i'm e-scared and plumbing because..well, there is a good reason why those guys get paid a lot of money. *shudder*
After



In the main house there was what we called "The Red Room". The previous owner had put down faux wood floors in the form of vinyl sheeting. The walls, I found out later were actually panneled with wallpaper board, you know the kind that goes in old mobile homes. Well you can't take the paper off that so the owner just got a bucket of drywall compound and went to town, making big blobs hoping for a faux venetian plaster finish im guessing. You'll see where I've had to sand down the blobs with a belt sander. The paneling was apparently put up over a textured wall that was too lumpy to take wallpaper. I found THAT after tearing out old built in book cases that they just walled AROUND. If only I had known that fact before I started trying to rip them out. I was literally hanging from the lip off the top and pushing off the wall with both feet trying to get the damned thing to budge. I dangled precariously hoping for the tell tale crack that I knew would send me falling on my ass, it never came. Instead I spent 20 hanging minutes wishing I had me some man muscles and cursing my noodly girly ones. Here is the aftermath...


You see the old green/blue walls in chunks that I had to fill in there with more luanne (sp?) and spackle etc etc.



Anyway it is all better now after 8 coats of Killz.

There was a long list of other stuff I had to do. Put quarter round through-out the house, paint etc. So that's where i've been. I'm pretty thrilled with myself but i've also decided that i'm pretty slow at everything. I'm going to take a few construction courses when I move to OR. There are womens groups there for chicks who like tools, so we'll see how that goes. Maybe it won't be so tiring when im not in louisiana heat. =)

Letting it all hang out

My ex decided to write me after 8 months of not speaking. I was dumb enough to reply and he is ignoring me again. Will someone please explain to me why? What is the point? And why do I continue to let him hurt me?


Alex,

Before you even start reading this, I want you to know that you do not need to write back. I'm not doing this for a response....

I just wanted to say that I know what I've done to you and there isn't anything that I can say to take the pain that I caused away, However that is not my intention. I am writing this so that you will know that I am sorry, as sorry as I possibly can be. I'm sure by now that you are somewhat over me and have moved on with your life and to be honest, that is what I have been hoping for all along. At night I imagine you you healthy, probably having stopped smoking and lost the weight that you had been wanting to get rid of... working on something constructive and probably in Oregon where you belong. At least this what I hope for you. Maybe you'll take comfort in knowing that I have regressed in many ways... and that I have seen and done things completely out of character for me and feel like the worlds biggest piece of shit for it.

I'm sorry for everything that I am and ever was. I'm sorry that I could not be the person that you needed and should have been.. I'm a child. Thats hard to admit because I like to think of myself as something more than that, but it is the truth....

Anyway... if you read this.. I just want you to know that you have not been and never will be forgotten and I will always love you.

I hope that you are well.

TJ

Alex L wrote:

How is Milo.

t j wrote:

You will be happy to know Milo is doing well.


Alex L wrote:


Sorry to hear that you aren't.

I have not been sure what to say. You are and always will be the love of my life. At least the person I thought you were will be. If the last year is any indication it seems I wont ever entirely get over that person. Anyone I have dated since then has been brutally compared. I know eventually I will have to settle or stay alone.
It's interesting that you would be writing me now. I am leaving for OR. in 5 days. Yes i've quit smoking (3 months so far), lost half the weight anyway and I have a lot of plans for the future. Overall I am well I guess.

And I'm sorry too. You were always the person I needed, I don't know what you thought I wanted but I already had it so far as I was concerned.

Anyway, how come you decided to email now?


Maybe he thought he'd rip off the scab and dig his finger in one last time. I don't know, I feel nauseous. I wish I could just let it all go and not care anymore.

Goofy Pics

Since things have been so serious lately I thought i'd add a little levity and give people something to laugh about....



I'm very serious.


But seem to be happier with 70's hair.

Tomorrow i'll post some photos of what i've been doing all this time. I'm tired and I need someone to rub my feet.

Victims keep being Victimized

WTF? 3 Days these people have been wading around without food or fresh water. Where the hell is all the federal aid? Where is the military? Where are the celebrity fund raisers? Why the f*k isn't Brad and Angelina on TV gathering help for OUR country? Aren't they exotic enough? Or maybe that's part of the problem.
I can't tell you how many people are wandering around MY city not knowing what to do with themselves. People are desperate, some of them are fighting. It is breaking my heart, especially when it comes to the elderly. I don't think most people realize what a 100 degree day is like in Louisiana. I can't imagine having to deal with it for 3 days, knee deep in dirty water with no fresh water to drink. It must feel like they've been suffering forever.
Seems that priority 1 to the powers that be are oil and gas prices. That's all i'm hearing Georgie talk about. Fuck the goddamned gas. People are still dying. Get off your collective asses and do what you've been over paid for.

The lack of progress for this situation is completely pathetic and there is no excuse for it. There isn't enough profanity to express my disgust.